Tag: toddler

Weaning from breastfeeding

- Julie Matheney

Deciding to wean your child is a choice only you can make. Some people make it for medical reasons. Some make it because they have to go back to work. Some make it because they simply are done with nursing. Whatever the reason, it is that person’s and that person’s alone.
If you decide to wean, here are some tips for gentle weaning:
⭐️ Start at a time when your baby has already naturally started to wean, i.e. only a quick snack before nap? Try cutting that out first. Waking up at 2am just to pacify to sleep? Maybe that one would be a good one to cut out first.
⭐️ Offer water in an open cup as an alternative.
Don’t offer, don’t refuse
⭐️ Wear clothing that makes accessing the breast/chest more difficult.
⭐️ Distract child with favorite activities or offer alternatives like a favorite snack
⭐️ Change your routine
⭐️ Postpone: “Let’s wait until after dinner” “After we play with the blocks”
⭐️ Shortening the length of feeding or strategically distracting baby when they want to nurse can help
⭐️ Talk to your baby and let them know how you are feeling, why you need to wean, and that you understand their feelings. Older children (2 years and up) can be part of the process by talking to them about what is happening.
⭐️ Be consistent – this is a hard one but it can be even more confusing to your baby if you allow them to nurse one time and not the next.
⭐️ Offer lots of cuddles, hugs, kisses. For some babies, this is a hard time. Your breast/chest is more than just food but also a great source of comfort. Showing them you are still a source of that comfort despite not nursing is incredibly important.

There will be tears, mostly likely from both of you. Some children decide on their own that they are done but it often doesn’t make it any easier for parents. Know that if you feel like it is time to wean then you are making the right decision. Also be prepared that some may experience mood changes and feelings of depression when weaning as your oxytocin and other hormones are dropping to stop milk production.

Tips for weaning under one:
Sometimes, it is necessary to wean a baby under one. Physical and mental health of the birthing person, medical situations, or a number of valid reasons can be the cause for needing to wean under one.
👍🏼 Aim for slow and steady to ensure breast/chest health and you/your baby’s emotional readiness
👍🏼Prepare for potential “booby blues”. Hormones shifts during weaning can make you feel a whole range of emotions.
👍🏼If you’re ready to wean but your baby isn’t, the process may be two steps forward one step back as you dance and compromise with your baby.

Setting breastfeeding boundaries with a toddler

- Julie Matheney

TODDLER BOUNDARIES

Breastfeeding has unique challenges at every age. You’d think after a combined total of 46 months of breastfeeding between my two girls I would have no stress, concerns or issues. Nope. Every child is an individual with their own virtues and vices. Every stage of breastfeeding has its own challenges and rewards.

In the toddler stage, I never worry about milk supply or if she’s getting enough milk. I know there’s milk. And at 19 months, Peach’s nutrition is coming from the family foods provided at meals and snacks. She’s getting a well balanced diet with multiple foods in each food group. Breast milk for her fills in nutritional gaps and provides immune boosting protection. I don’t worry about pumping. I retired my trusty pump almost 4 months ago. Shes (finally)(mostly) sleeping through the night and were both enjoying the rest. The biggest concern in the toddler phase is boundaries. How long and often can/should she have access to the breast? What to do when she asks for the breast and for whatever reason it’s not appropriate to feed at the moment?

There is no right or wrong answer to this question. It comes down to what is best and what works for your family. Some will continue to nurse on demand and others will limit to certain times of day. Both of which are good choices. Both also mean continued breastfeeding and neither option necessarily means you’re ready to wean. But it can be difficult to process through how to manage these boundaries and navigate your next stage of development. Especially as toddlers are learning to ask for things and control their environment. And then tantrum or act out of frustration when they don’t get their way. If you’re struggling with this stage, I have phone consultations available to help find what works for your family.

Where are you getting your feeding advice from?

- Julie Matheney

Feeding “advice” we would never tell an adult:

⌚️It hasn’t been 3 hours yet. You can’t possibly be hungry again

⏱It hasn’t been 3 hours yet. You can’t possibly be thirsty again.

🧊You need to drink all 64oz of your daily water intake in 4 equally portioned cups. If you can’t drink 16 ounces in one sitting, something is wrong with you.

🍽Clean plate club. Finish everything on your plate regardless of how full your stomach feels.

🍏Eat food purely for their nutritional value. 🍦Never have food simply for the comfort or enjoyment of it.

🔦Eat alone in a dark room and never with anyone else

💡How could you get so distracted while eating? Focus and pay attention.

🪑Eat until you’re done then leave the table immediately. Don’t hang out at the table for longer than needed.

🛌Never eat a bed time snack

🛏Wake up in the middle of the night thirsty? Too bad. Go back to bed you can have some water in the morning

⏰You have 15 minutes to eat. Tic toc. When the clock hits 15 you need to stop whether you’re done or not

🍴3 meals, 2 snacks. That’s it. 7, 9, 12, 3 and 5. Hungry or thirsty at a different time? Here’s a pen cap to chew on

🍔There’s only one way to eat and if you don’t eat like me and my family you’re doing it wrong

Do you get where I’m going here? Too often we analyze the science of breastfeeding instead of considering the art of feeding and eating. We try to make a literal formula for how our baby should eat when some times we have to appreciate feeding for what it is: an enjoyable and pleasurable sensory experience that is social and includes more than just calorie intake.

Where did my milk go?

- Julie Matheney

What can cause a late onset decreased milk supply?

1.The mother is pregnant again. Milk supply decreases during pregnancy. Domperidone will not work when the mother is pregnant.

2.The mother is taking some hormonal birth control method (pill including progestin only pill, IUD, etc)

3.The mother is breastfeeding on only one side at a feeding or “block feeding” (several feedings in a row on the same breast, used to treat “overabundant milk ejection, “overabundant milk supply”). I have posted on “block feeding” previously.

4.Some medications other than hormones can decrease the milk supply (antihistamines for example).

5.Can an emotional shock decrease the milk supply? Possible but unusual in our experience.

6.Blocked ducts/mastitis as well as any febrile illness may decrease the milk supply.

7.The use of bottles more than occasionally can very much decrease the milk supply.

8.”Overdoing it”. It’s time that others do most of the usual chores that fall on women’s shoulders.

9.An “abundant milk supply” associated with a less than “ideal” latch. In this situation, the milk flows into the baby’s mouth with little participation of the baby. The baby may often choke while breastfeeding, especially when the mother has a milk ejection reflex. A tongue tie is a common cause of a baby having a less than “ideal” latch and can be a significant cause of late onset decreased milk supply even if neither the mother or the baby had problems early on.

This problem of late onset decreased milk supply and accompanying symptoms is typically the problem of the mother who once had an abundant milk supply and milk supply may still be quite good, but less than it once was.

Natural Weaning from the Breast

- Julie Matheney

NATURAL WEANING

Natural weaning is the biological process of gradually decreasing milk supply as baby gets older. This process starts around 7-9 months as baby takes more solid foods and progresses toward sleeping longer stretches at night. It ends when baby finally weans (which may not be until 2-3 years old!!). Natural weaning doesn’t mean that you need to wean baby from the breast. Decreasing milk supply doesn’t mean you’re at risk of losing your supply, either. Your breast is designed to match the stage of development your baby is in. 

Milk supply iss highest from month 1-6 when baby is going through multiple growth spurts. They need to double their birth weight by 6 months. Milk is also the only food in their diet.  Therefore, your milk supply is supposed to be at its highest to meet their nutritional needs. From 6-12 months, weight gain slows but their need for milk volume needs remain stable. It is natural as baby transitions from a full milk diet to a milk+solids diet to then a solids+milk diet that breast milk supply will shift along with it. Your milk supply varies compared to baby’s solids intake and there is a wide range of normal based on your individual baby. Some babies love solids and eat them in large quantities many times a day. Other babies continue on a mostly milk diet until almost 1 year.  At 12 months, milk finally takes a back seat to solids, but still fills in nutritional gaps and acts like medicine against illness. From 12 months on there continues to be a wide range of normal for milk supply depending on your child’s eating and feeding habits. Some babies continue to nurse occasionally over night while others seem to become boob barnacles again and would happily stay on the breast all day, every day.

So what does this mean? If you’re exclusively breastfeeding you may not notice anything.  You can continue to bring baby to breast for as long and often as baby wants. You may notice baby spacing out feedings or not nursing as long. They may want the breast more when teething or going through growth spurts or developmental leaps. They have days with little interest in the breast. 

Moms who pump (either exclusively or because of work) report overflowing milk in the early weeks, often able to pump 4-6 or even 8-10 ounces in a morning pump session. By 4 months supply regulates and mom gets about 3-5 ounces per pump in place of a feeding. By 9 or 10 months it can feel like your trying to wring out a wet rag to get even 2-4 ounces a pump session. As long as baby has unrestricted access to the breast when your not working and you still have a regular pump routine in place no intervention is usually needed. Every journey is supposed to look different because it is your unique journey.

Photo Credit Jermaine Love
@jermainelove44