I lost my mother to a brain tumor when I was 13 weeks pregnant with Peach. It was a very traumatic and unexpected event in my life. I’ve had to process and grieve the lost expectation of having my mom around to enjoy my children growing up. Every year, Mother’s Day is a painful reminder that my mom is gone. I love being a mother now, but it still flairs my grief to see my friends having brunch with their moms. As I’ve processed through my grief, I have finally come to a place where I can celebrate my friend’s stories while still honoring my own experience.

We are starting World Breastfeeding Week. Breastfeeding is one of the hardest things you can do as a parent and we need to all be mindful that this week could be a trigger for those that wanted to breastfeed and could not. There are many reasons for why breastfeeding doesn’t go as intended.

Difficult labor and delivery, premature or sick babies, history of breast surgery, use of medications, and undiagnosed or untreated medical conditions can cause lactation difficulties from the start. Some would have received little to no support or were given bad recommendations from uneducated healthcare professionals. Many tried and tried for months and did all of the things and there was never a good answer for why it didn’t work.

Breastfeeding is not all or nothing, pass/fail. Any breast milk given to your baby is breastfeeding. Directly, via bottle, with a syringe, SNS. Even on a drop. It is OK to grieve the lost expectation of breastfeeding when it doesn’t go as anticipated. It is ok to celebrate the journey that it was. We see you. We hear you. We stand and support you. You are amazing!